Woman to Woman: When bearing with one another is just barely.

Some things are easy to do together as women. Eating. Chatting. Shopping. Put all three together and we have the perfect day. Well, most women, anyway. We can all agree on at least two of those, though, can’t we?

Some things aren’t so easy to do together as women. Agreeing on where to eat. Cutting each other off trying to chat. And telling her she really shouldn’t buy that dress in that color…or that size. Unless you are for REAL friends, then maybe you can pull that off without angst. Maybe.

In thinking about the next part of Colossians 3:12-14 we have been unpacking for several weeks now (details here)…we come to the thought of “bearing with one another.”

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness,humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another…” (Colossians 3:12-13)

Sounds really good. But how do we do that? What does that look like? What does that mean…?

To be exact, the word bear as defined by Merriam-Webster’s means “something that is difficult to do or deal with.”

My nose is a little wrinkled at that. And then I laugh a little, too. Yep. That can be me. Most days. If not every. day.

So how do we as women learn to “bear” with one another?

The way I see it, there is only one way. In love. Through Jesus.

Sounds simple enough. So why is it so hard?

Why is it hard to bear with our sisters through the good times and the bad? We are fairly good at being there for one another when the rudder falls off and the ship starts sailing out to sea.

But what about bearing with one another on the good days? 

Why is it hard to be happy for our sister when her life is going good and ours is not. so. much?

I’m speaking to me. Why can’t I just be plain happy about this woman’s writing accomplishments and not envy her in the least? Why can’t I look at this other photographer’s site and not wish my photos were as good as hers and I could explain myself on my “Me” page so eloquently?

It all goes back to comparison, doesn’t it? Ugly. Old. Comparison.

We’ve all got warts. Yours may be bigger than mine or yours may be smaller. But a wart is still a wart. (I don’t have any pictures of warts and if I did, I wouldn’t submit you to them.)

When we can learn to bear with another, warts and all, then ladies, we will be getting somewhere.

When we can give each other flowers daily through grace we will arrive. We may not get flowers from our man every day, but why can’t we shower each other with some grace flowers of our own?

danville-va-lifestyle-photographer_0001 danville-va-lifestyle-photographer_0002 danville-va-lifestyle-photographer_0003 danville-va-lifestyle-photographer_0004

I know it can be done. I’ve seen some amazing acts of grace and Jesus pouring out of women in several communities lately. Like this new-to-me community at (in)courage where they just chose nine over-the-top talented women to join their writing crew.

And oh-my-soul I was brave (or dumb) enough to submit an application…just because. Because I’m a dreamer like that these days. And they were gracious enough to not only send me an email but a beautiful note (like the kind you get in the mail…yeah they still have those and here are some beautiful ones I may just buy myself) full of grace saying they prayed over 475 entries and could only choose nine and that didn’t include me…yet. Well, I included the “yet,”…because I’m a dreamer. 😉

And Lisa-Jo Baker’s Five Minute Friday crew and twitter parties are full of other blogging women giving grace and loving on others. There’s cake and chocolate and coffee every Thursday night. It’s the only place to be. Unless you fall asleep rocking your three-year old, which also happens to me a lot of Thursday nights.

And then there’s the Compel community where so many writers are coming together and encouraging one another…bearing with one another…even when it’s kind of hard because in our gut we wish we had what she had. Her words. Her website. Her number of followers. Oh, yeah, that’s a big one for me lately. How on earth do you get over 1000 followers?! Le’ sigh…

All of this to say…it’s not always easy to bear with our sisters. But it’s always right. And always the better way.

It’s the way of Christ. Bearing one another’s burdens. And bearing one another’s joy, too, I believe.

To bear with your sister is to be like Christ. And that’s worth the bearing, even if somedays it’s just barely. There’s grace for that.

And the more we learn to bear our sisters burdens and joys, the closer we get and more apt we are to be able to tell her she really needs to try on a different dress. Amen?

Thankful you are bearing with me,



On Wednesday’s we have started a tradition of speaking “Woman to Woman.” Find us on twitter or Facebook with #w2w. I’ve asked other sisters to join in the discussion by adding their own links below or by adding their thoughts in the comments. If you have a blog and would like to link your post, please link directly to your permalink (ie. https://4hisgloryblog.com/2014/04/02/woman-to-woman-patiently-impatient/) and not your homepage URL (ie. http://4hisgloryblog.com) by clicking on the little blue frog below. You can go back to the beginning to see the foundation for this community here. We would be humbled beyond belief to have you join in. The more voices speaking to one another, the more chance we will be heard and the more opportunity for healing and growing as sisters. And to spur one another on in love, we ask that you visit the person linked before you and comment to encourage. Our words matter. In giving and receiving, they matter. You matter. More than you know. We matter. xoxo- Meredith

NEXT WEEK we will hash out forgiveness and putting on LOVE…which binds everything together. Come back and join us, won’t you?


15 thoughts on “Woman to Woman: When bearing with one another is just barely.

  1. You were my burden bearer yesterday, dear Meredith. Your words match your heart, that’s for sure, because it shows in your actions. Let me tell you, one day you WILL have 1000’s of followers. I would even be willing to put $ on that, my friend! 😏

  2. Thank you for sharing and for the encouragement. This is so important for all women to get so our little ones know what a Christ like friend looks like. Thank you!

  3. You are just a delight, Meredith. You have a gift. You simply share your heart so beautifully. Loved this! Spoke right to my heart. Oh that crazy comparison game we play when we should be bearing each other’s burdens and JOY. I really needed this reminder and encouragement. THANK YOU. Blessings to you.

  4. “Comparison…Ugly. Old. Comparison.” Oh, how often we compare ourselves to others. Oh, how often we don’t want others to compare themselves to us. Oh, how often we NEED to compare ourselves to JESUS!

    “…give each other flowers daily through grace…” Wow! I LOVE that! “Grace flowers.” Isn’t that what Jesus does every single day? He gives us grace flowers all. day. long.

    We need each other…to be kind and loving and forgiving and patient and present and honest. We are made for relationship. We need to be together–in person and in spirit. Oh, and let’s bring some of those grace flowers along to brighten up our days!

    Thank you for starting my day with some grace flowers of God’s truth and your sweet friendship.

  5. Love this, as always. Such a good and timely reminder. Feeling a bit overwhelmed and inadequate to “keep up” today, and this post is a breath of fresh, real air. Thank you for your grace and encouragement as we cheer each other on. I too got the “no” e-mail and gracious card, and I too am interpreting it as “not yet”- hoping our “yeses” come at the same time, but if not, we keep cheering on regardless.:)

    • Thank you for encouraging me on this, Katie. I almost scrapped this entire post, I felt like I was in a different mood and maybe I was being too “real and raw” today. But, here it is because it’s what was on my heart. Not my most eloquent post…but real, none-the-less. Girl, I hope our “yeses” come at the same time, too, but you have my word if they don’t…I’m your number one cheerleader! I feel like God is telling me more and more that is my “yes” from Him. To cheer if nothing else. 😉 You don’t know what your encouragement and just being linked up here on this Wednesday does for this soul. Bless you new, sweet friend. 🙂

    • Well, I’m cheering both of you on for submitting your applications! I am (in)couraged by the words of grace that flow from you, and I know the Lord is pleased with your faithful obedience to share His love and truth with the whole wide world. Isn’t that so amazing–the whole wide world!

      • Thank you, Sabra That is a pretty amazing truth and you are doing the same thing with your beautiful words. It’s so wonderful that we can all cheer each other on for His glory. Blessings!

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